Granting Yourself Permission


perm crop shadowDay-in. Day-out.  We start and finish so many of our days with the same patterns and habits that have become natural and familiar to us.  Natural and familiar are comfortable.  Comfortable leads to routine results and lack of progress.  What if you had to ask permission to do every action you choose to do in your day.  Sounds terrible, right?  The reality is that YOU are granting yourself permission every day to do the things you do.  You are granting permission to prioritize some activities over others, to take the easy but unhealthy option for meals, to stay late at work and miss family dinner.  This isn’t all bad.  It’s just worth thinking about.

When you choose to complete a specific task, you give yourself permission to not attend to other tasks during that time.  When your phone rings in the midst of the task you’ve chosen, you either give yourself permission to be distracted, or you give yourself permission to silence the call and stay focused.  No matter what you do, you’re giving yourself permission to act.

Key Question: Are You ASKING Permission?

So much of our day is driven by what has become routine and normal that we often fail to realize the allowance we are giving ourselves because we are not stopping to ask ourselves for clear permission.  We aren’t taking the time and committing the focus to make a decision to either grant or deny permission.  This set of routine, habitual behaviours is stopping you from achieving your wildest dreams and biggest goals.

If you hire a coach whose top job was to keep you on-track to Best Yourself, what does your day look like?  When your coach fully understands the breadth of your personal, professional and social goals, how do they instruct you?  What permissions does your professional coach grant you and when do they redirect you?  How much progress do you make towards your goals in one day when you have to consciously ask permission from someone whose sole purpose is to keep you on-track to your goals?

Why can’t you be your own coach?  Your goals are important to you!  Your goals are worth your focus.  Your progress is worth your effort to consciously connect with your decisions and ask yourself for permission throughout the day.  It’s not going to be easy.

Here’s how to get a head-start:

  1. Write out 5 things you gave yourself permission to do today that in retrospect, you probably shouldn’t have done!  Create awareness so that you aren’t ‘tricked’ next time!
  2. Write out 5 things you should have given yourself permission to do today, but didn’t.  Increase your commitment to the actions that are important to your goals.
  3. Set your default permissions by understanding the actions that must be completed each day and that are more important than any other potential demands.  Remember: Winning is in the Habits!

Awareness is the key to granting yourself permission to do the right things that will move you to Best Yourself while also denying permission to engage in the time-sucking distractions that move you away from your desired outcomes.  Heighten your awareness throughout the day to consciously grant yourself permissions.  Finish each day with the 3 step activity to review your decisions throughout the day and heighten your awareness for the next day.

Anything you do or don’t do is a result of the permission you give yourself.

Eirinn Boots

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image credit: google dictionary

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